Example: 🌳 Honesty
You're a good person, and you are surrounded by good people. What you do is important, and needs to be guided by your core values. So you have a discussion and decide that honesty is essential to everyone involved. That's a clear group value right? Job done. You picked a word!
Oxford English Dictionary
Honesty, n. the quality of being honest.
🙄 Ok, how about…
- free of deceit; truthful and sincere. "I haven't been totally honest with you"
- morally correct or virtuous. "I did the only right and honest thing"
- fairly earned, especially through hard work. "he's struggling to make an honest living"
- done with good intentions even if unsuccessful or misguided. "he'd made an honest mistake"
Even in the dictionary, honesty has multiple meanings. And in practice, personal approaches to being honest can look quite different. Using Human Systems analysis, I tracked what kinds of honesty are important to the members of my work team (as opposed to dictionary definitions):
What way of being honest is important to you?
Anne: speaking about what's up like it's no big deal
Serge: owning your mistakes and shortcomings
Joe: meeting a person rather than a task, plan, or desire
Nathan: examining my emotional life and inner landscape
Let's call that...
yes, I stole the cookie
Clearly, people on my team could have used different words. They might have gone with authenticity, connection, integrity, openness, surrender, sobriety, spontaneity, vulnerability. But they might not have all agreed on any one of these other words as a "core value".
And the definition problem runs even deeper. Honesty is a noun. But what about being honest (an adverb)? What phrase—in Human Systems terms, what 🌳 personal value—captures the way you direct your attention when you're approaching life that way? Here, the true diversity of my team's values comes into focus:
If you rely on the dictionary definition of honesty, you miss what your team actually cares about. You might design an org structure that is:
- free of deceit; truthful and sincere
but makes no room for "facing people". You could plan a meeting that is:
- morally correct or virtuous
but doesn't facilitate "pedestrian straight-talk". It's easy to see how your team's core value of honesty can become an empty word.
The diversity of 🌳 personal values is one of the strongest features of any group. And not being clear about what really matters to individuals threatens group flourishing. When personal values are suppressed, people become frustrated, hopeless, and disengaged. But if everyone's contribution feels like an expression of their true selves, whatever you do together will feel meaningful, and your collective passion and creativity will be unleashed.
So what does it look like when social games support personal values?
Continue Reading Here:
Or return to the Table of Contents:
How Can Improve My Social Arts Skills?
Personalised Social Arts Training
Personalized Social Arts Training
Nathan Vanderpool holds B.A.'s in philosophy and psychology, M.A.'s in cultural studies and religious studies, and a PhD in sociology. He has spent years designing rituals and games, and takes special delight in facilitating small-scale personal and social transformation.
Access 120+ Social Games & Practices to Try Today
Social Arts | Suite of Practices - Free
Access over 120 social relating games, personal development practices, group practices...Navigate the suite and find games &amp; practices for: * Introspection* Emotionally Checking In* Improving Communication* Conflict Resolution* Peer Support and Empathy Building AND MORE! The social arts dojo is now open, and your new trainers are here to help!